The gloves are off…it’s time to come clean. Not that I haven’t been already all this time…but over the past week, I’ve been fairly shut down emotionally.
Over the past few weeks, I’ve been experiencing a major depression; and though I’ve been posting, I will be honest and reveal that my heart hasn’t been in the connecting business at all. In fact, it has been in the withdrawing business – and God started doing some major work at the end of the week last week.
I began to open up to a few key friends in my life, and I’m glad I did. I began to exercise the very tools in my toolbox God has given to me to use – and I took out:
- telling someone else…and….
- …asking for prayer.
Yet, these are the two hardest things to do when in the heat of battle.
When we are in the heat of an emotional, and spiritual, battle – it’s often we retreat from the very first two defensive tools we have at our disposal always. To be able to tell another person, and ask for prayer in our lives.
Pride covers a multitude of sin, and depression will cover a multitude of pain from others.
It hides you so well, that you feel no one cares about you and really doesn’t want to; and letting it win is Satan’s greatest joy. I much rather give the devil himself a black eye by getting God in the mix of all this pain, rather than let him get one little chuckle out of it.
And just because you confess it and ask for prayer, doesn’t mean you’ll get immediate results. Nope…nuh-uh…not one bit. It means, however, God will at least be activated in your life to begin the healing process….and at times, it isn’t pretty the process He needs us to go through.
Yesterday was deeply reflective of that as there was an absolute division between my parents and myself at this point in time. They’re determined to believe my life as a Christian is a farse, for they still view me as a Jew; and they refuse to believe I am who I say I am in Him.
Though this nail drives deep into my soul and ails me beyond explanation – I know who is at the core of all this. I know he not only is attacking my heart – but above all, he is attacking theirs.
Friends, the fifth commandment tells us to “Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.” (Ex. 20:12 – NIV) Honor has nothing to do with what we do for our parents, but simply how we value them.
My parents, though they said some deeply hurtful things to me, are valuable beyond what words can reveal. I love them deeply, and I honor them even deeper – even though they can’t see it just yet. I love them right where they’re at, just as God does – no matter what they say or do.
In my sharing this today, it’s my hope you find encouragement in your own life to love anyone who may be causing you deep hurt in your life. It could be a parent, or both of them. It could be a spouse, a friend, a son or daughter, or some other family member – or even a complete stranger.
Friends, we all have brokenness – and it all runs deeper than we can even imagine. We can’t fix one another’s brokenness, but we can help God get in the mix of others’ lives through our valuing of those who treat us poorly so He can heal the brokenness. Love people where they’re at, in all the capacity you are able that God has granted to you. Value them as God does…and watch Him do the work of transformation in your life; and theirs.